Lily + Patrick by Krista K

We wanted a very elegant and opulent day without it being so stuffy

Tell us a little about yourselves, what you do, what you love…

Patrick and I are the rare breed of Los Angeles natives. Patrick is a wholesale meat trader, and I’m a former stop-motion animator turned insurance agent. We have been together for 7.5 years and do everything together. When we aren’t working, we are probably playing tennis. We both grew up playing competitive tennis, and both even coached for a time. Tennis is more of a lifestyle for us than a casual hobby. Wood racquets adorn our house; we travel to watch professional tournaments, and tennis courts are a must-have at any hotels we stay at. We are also huge foodies, so we are constantly exploring new restaurants. Our 13-year-old dog Hailey is our whole life, and there is almost nowhere she does not come along to. Most of all, we are homebodies. We like starting our days early so we get back home sooner, whether that is to play cards out in the backyard or get into bed and watch a show.

How/where/when did you meet – and what were your first impressions?

We met in 2019 in the quintessential way nowadays, on a dating app. I was intrigued by his pictures of him playing tennis, and he liked my pictures of me attending Rams football games. Patrick arranged our first date at a sports bar in Santa Monica known for pool. Patrick’s first impression that he always brings up is how much shorter and tinier I was than he expected; from then on, I’ve been his “peanut”. My first impression of Patrick was how intensely charming he was; there was a magnetism to him. We watched March Madness basketball games and talked so much we never ended up getting around to that game of pool. That was a Thursday, and by the end of the night we agreed to our second date that Saturday, where we played paddle tennis down in Venice Beach; this would come to be our constant weekend pastime.

What styling and visual elements worked best for you? (could be things, the florals, particular hire products or your marquee, etc., something the stylist created or simply just the scenic beauty of your location or the existing design of your venue).

Patrick and I had a very strong vision of what we wanted our wedding to feel like and embody. We wanted a very elegant and opulent day without it being so stuffy that it wouldn’t feel like us. We were in search of an Italian villa in SoCal, so when we found Olive Grove, it wasn’t a question that we had found the right place. The venue is so picturesque and impeccably maintained that it really didn’t require a heavy hand to elevate it into what we envisioned. It was also very important that the venue was all outdoors, as we think that always adds a slightly more relaxed feel to any black-tie event. A lot of our decisions were informed by old-world glamour. Every year, Patrick, my family, and I travel to Newport, Rhode Island, and the Gilded Age elegance and sprawling lawn events were something we constantly thought back to as a through line. Silver-chased platters and champagne bowls, crystal glasses, and antique carved terracotta planters were really important styling items that informed the rest of our design. We balanced all those structural elements with playful pink and chartreuse florals that we wanted to sprawl and drip, nothing too tight or inorganic.

What did you enjoy most about the planning process, and do you have any tips for couples starting their wedding planning journey?

The most joyous part of the planning was first being so in sync as a couple on every decision. Whether that was styling, food, or music playlists, we were in lockstep the whole way. The second part was our planners, Jess and Lauren. It didn’t take long for them to feel like our friends rather than a vendor. They were so patient and enthusiastic, which made it such a comforting experience for one that is so foreign. They arranged weekly calls because emailing just wasn’t going to be effective for us. The amount of laughing we did on those calls really cannot be overstated. Having a team we could really trust to understand and bring our vision to life made what is notoriously a stressful process fun and exciting at each step, especially when we started to see all of the pieces start to come together in the final months.

Tell us about your vendors. Were there any standout suppliers you would like to make special mention of?

Of course, our photographer, Krista. She was the best recommendation from a close friend and also one of the first vendors we signed.

I have a particularly strong point of view, especially when it comes to all of our wedding paper. I designed our save-the-dates and did a large portion of the designing for our wedding invites. Our planners found Danielle from Second Twin Stationery because I really wanted to collaborate on signage. And Danielle was so amazing; from the first few minutes of our introduction call, I knew she was someone who was going to be so fun to work with. She was so easy to communicate with and understood the vision I had pretty quickly, even if I wasn’t always the most eloquent at expressing it. She has an amazing ability to adapt to so many different styles, and I was just so impressed with how she was able to elevate my rough ideas. She was also so attentive to every detail that I wanted to explore. She had chosen an amazing cursive font type, but the letter T for that font just felt off. She spent 30 minutes with me searching through different fonts to custom pair a perfect cursive T.

Tell us about your main outfits, what was unique, and is there a story?

Patrick knew very immediately that he wanted a Ralph Lauren tux for our wedding. He was inspired by my dad’s Ralph Lauren tux, so he didn’t even visit any other shops. He originally went in wanting a notch label but ended up really taken with the shawl labels. His tux was so immaculate that he decided to forgo any accessories for a more classical look.

Once Patrick and I became engaged, I went through the instagram search, saving inspiration to a wedding folder. I always knew that I wanted a ballgown for my wedding. I’ve always loved the dramatic flare of those archaic skirt silhouettes that once used to be so commonplace. The other parameters for my dress were strapless and a shiny, heavy silk. One of the first dresses I had saved to that folder was the Lady Galia Lahav dress I would eventually choose. I went to a couple of different dress boutiques and even had a deposit set to make a custom dress. Plans changed about 6 months before our wedding, and I was back to the drawing board. I went back through my original folder and fell in love all over again with that Galia Lahav dress. It just so happens that they have a showroom in LA that is 5 minutes from my house. So on a lunch break I stopped in to try the dress. I was in and out in about 15 minutes with the deposit paid.

Tell us about your wedding and engagement rings.

The story of how we each got our rings is so emblematic of both of our personalities. I’m super particular; I get my mind set on something, and can’t let it go until I achieve it. Patrick, knowing this about me, really wanted me to have exactly what I wanted, so he let me be super involved in the process. We went to a family friend jeweller to design the ring and source the diamond. I had my heart set on a large 6-carat pristine oval diamond, and we ultimately decided the stone was so glorious that the rest of the design should be super simple to not overcomplicate it. We went with a gold band and a very small hidden halo for a small pop.

For Patrick’s ring, in typical fashion for him, the whole process took less than 15 minutes. We went to a family friend of his mother who owns his jewellery shop in Santa Monica. He tried on 5 rings and knew immediately. He picked a white gold band that perfectly matches his Rolex.

What were one or two elements that were most important to you both that you were happy to spend a little more on? (food, photography, florals, the venue, your outfits?).

We knew how important having an amazing photographer would be. Krista made us feel so comfortable and really emphasised that we only need to focus on being present for our day and that she would take care of the rest. She captured the essence of our day so perfectly. We are so excited to relive our day all over again when we receive our final gallery.

As foodies, the menu was also another important element that we knew we wanted to be a larger portion of the budget. We’ve been to several weddings where the food was really amazing, and it’s something we still talk about today. Patrick and I really wanted that takeaway for our guests. We had 6 different trays of passed hors d’oeuvres, which we think are always some of the best and most creative bites. We also swapped a salad for a pasta course. There are so many days to be healthy, but who wants salad when you could have pasta!

Was there a favourite moment (or two) that you will treasure always?

Our first dance was a really special moment for us. It was something we were both looking forward to and were slightly anxious about. We planned a pretty ambitious dance for two people who are not dancers. Patrick choreographed the whole thing, and we spent every day the week before the wedding practising. It was particularly nerve-wracking for me because I had no idea how I was going to be able to spin and jump in my huge ballgown dress. It was a huge relief when we nailed it. We also didn’t exchange vows in front of our guests because we aren’t very comfortable being that vulnerable with an audience. So our first day was really that intimate shared moment with our guests.

Another moment was our final song of the night. Mr Brightside is a favourite song of both of us; I love The Killers, and Patrick does too because he is a Bills fan. Having all our friends and family on the dance floor singing at the top of their lungs to one of our favourites was a pretty cinematic moment. Our photographer and videographer had both left by then, and we were completely present and aware that the day we had planned for over a year was seconds away from being over.

What does being married mean to you, and are there any special rituals you have that you would like to share?

We have known each other for 7.5 years and have lived together for two. In a lot of ways, we have been going through the motions of marriage already. We are both very committed and intensely loyal people to each other, so there has already been this unspoken and understood marriage-like agreement. But to actually very intentionally speak and perform that commitment is so meaningful. To take a day to focus on just us and our love as a couple really grounds us in the weight of how important this next chapter is for us. It was even nicer to immediately follow our wedding with a two-week honeymoon to bask in it.